Mike has had some kind of stomach issue for the last 4 days. The flu is going around but, it doesn't seem like that. The only time he throws up is at work...which reminds me, remember when we were in school and used to lie about throwing up in the bathroom just to go home?? Yeah....and he hasn't had any "bathroom" problems so I'm calling "bullshit". I think he's just a puss. Like most men...
However, despite all the moaning and groaning and painful screams, he still won't go to the ER. This was literally our conversation last night...mind you this is when he came home from work at 2 in the morning and scared the shit out of me because he didn't tell me he was coming home.
Mike: "I almost stopped at the hospital."
Me: "Why didn't you?"
Mike: *shiver, shiver, moan, shiver, moan* "Because they probably wouldn't do anything."
Me: *eye roll* "Oh."
Mike: *shiver, shiver, groan, shiver, moan, shiver* Repeat 2380236876529708502395 times.
Me: "If you're seriously having that hard of a time you should probably go to the ER. You sound ridiculous. I mean if it's that bad you're probably going to die tonight, so we might want to head out."
Mike: *miraculously stopped shivering* "You're mean. You don't even care how I feel." *remembers he's supposed to shiver...shiver, shiver, moan, groan, shoot me.*
Me: "Listen, you're shaking the whole bed. I'm getting nauseous."...........
Ugh...they're so dramatic!!
Like Mike can literally say..."Man I feel like I might be getting sick." and I'm online looking for flights far far away. Any nanny takers for when Mike's sick?!?!
What do you do when your man acts like that?!?!